• Ellen’s Helping Out with Homework!
    Articles,  Blog

    Ellen’s Helping Out with Homework!

    – SOME PEOPLE REALLY ENJOY THE HOLIDAYS. I’LL TELL YOU WHO DOESN’T: STUDENTS. BECAUSE THEY GET STRESSED OUT. MIDTERMS ARE HAPPENING. SO YOU KNOW ME, I’M ALWAYS TRYING TO HELP. I ASKED THEM IF THEY SEND ME THEIR HOMEWORK QUESTIONS, I’LL HELP ‘EM ‘CAUSE I HAVE A SEGMENT, HOMEWORKER HELPERER. – [singing] A, B, C. EASY AS ONE, TWO, THREE. AS SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI. A, B, C. ONE, TWO, THREE. BABY, YOU AND ME, GIRL. EASY AS ONE, TWO, THREE. AS SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI. – NO, NO TIME. NO TIME FOR FUN. RECESS IS OVER. HERE IS THE FIRST QUESTION I RECEIVED. THIS IS FROM JARED…

  • Achmed the Dead Terrorist Has a Son – Jeff Dunham – Controlled Chaos | JEFF DUNHAM
    Articles,  Blog

    Achmed the Dead Terrorist Has a Son – Jeff Dunham – Controlled Chaos | JEFF DUNHAM

    Jeff: Look, what I want you to do is, I just want you to look over there while I’m getting him out. So you won’t peek, okay? Just look over there. Achmed: Oh, wait a minute. When I’m not looking, are you going to kill me? No. That’s actually a good way of doing it, you know. Kind of old-school, but effective. It’s like, “Hey look at that—” [sound of choking] Jeff: Now, just look over there and don’t look back until I say so. Achmed: Okay, whatever. This is kind of like Christmas, huh? Jeff: Yeah, just look over there, [Achmed: Okay.] don’t peek. Achmed: Okay. Achmed: Okay, not…

  • Totaljobs mobile job search site – It’s not luck, it’s totaljobs
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    Totaljobs mobile job search site – It’s not luck, it’s totaljobs

    Mr Luck: Heyyyyy how you doing? Looking for a job? First, give your CV a facelift, be liberal with glitter. You’re a volcano of employment. Melt them with your job heat. Come here, talk to me. Oh come on what? Luck is so lonely. Don’t rely on luck, stay in control of your job hunt on the go with our new mobile site. It’s not luck, it’s Totaljobs.com